“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation, and go to the grave with the song still in them.”
Henry David Thoreau
I was at a business networking event today and a wonderful lady I know used this quote to illustrate her point.
It made me sad to think about it, mostly because I think it is probably true.
Is It Because They Lack Confidence To Do It?
There are loads of ways you can pretend to have confidence – to fake it ’til you make it! There are workarounds that might give you a bit of a boost wearing those heels, or a particular outfit perhaps. But what if you could develop complete inner confidence so that you could shine regardless of where you were, what you wore, or who you were with?
How Do You Develop Inner Confidence Like That?
5 Tips For Developing Awesome Inner Confidence
- Know Your ‘Why’. What is your vision, your mission or your purpose? If you’ve ever had an absolute mission you will know how focussed and unstoppable you can be. If you’ve never experienced this, think about the vision that Oprah Winfrey, Richard Branson, Angeline Jolie, even Madonna (I love her, but some people don’t) must have. They know exactly what they want from life, what their mission is, what song they must sing. And they damn well sing it, don’t they? Finding your purpose is massive. Having a vision for how you want your future to look, why you’re doing what you’re doing, who you would like to help or inspire are all reasons ‘Why’. What is yours? (A coach can help you form this if you’re struggling.)
- Follow Your Intuition. I know, I talk about this a lot and there are loads of articles on this website about it. When you trust in your intuition, you just know that the right people, places and things will appear, as if by magic. Ladies, when we work with our intuition we stand in our power – we engage with one of our feminine superpowers! And it is amazing. We can feel guided, lucky, safe, and on track. It contributes immensely to our inner confidence. For more in this why not start with this article on why you should follow your intuition.
- Breathe! Take a breath before you walk into a room. Breathe deeply before you have to stand up and speak. Breathe from your belly – that means not holding your stomach in by the way – allowing your lungs to fill properly. Breathing is especially important if you have to present, or even just do a 60 second pitch at a business event. If you know how to breathe correctly; allowing your stomach muscles to relax on the in breathe, and then using them to help actively expel the air as you speak and exhale, you will also sound more confident and be able to project your voice further. Your voice will sound more full and rounded rather than wispy and quiet.
- Energy. You need enough energy to keep yourself full of life and vigour, this is really practical and also a bit more esoteric. This is a vast subject but think about enough sleep, good exercise and fresh air (get those happy hormones flooding your bloodstream), great nutrition, quiet time, and what ever else you need to ensure you are at your optimum. (more on this here – Need More Energy?) But also understand how to ground your energy to help with confidence in the moment. It can be as simple as planting your feet firmly and evenly distributing your weight rather than standing (wobbling) on one leg – especially if you’re in heels ladies! Bend your knees slightly and just imagine roots coming out of the soles of your feet. This sinks your energy in to your lower body and helps you to be present in the room. Excellent just before speaking. If you feel a little overwhelmed go in to the toilets and do it before going back to the event!
- Posture. Posture can have two different meanings here. The way you stand physically, and your approach or attitude. When you believe in what you are doing (see point no. 1) and you have the right energy, and trust your intuition, you will have a positive approach and attitude. People can sense that. In terms of physical posture, stand tall, ground your energy (see above), shoulders back, engage your stomach muscles and lift your head. (Imagine that someone is pulling a strand of your hair from the top of your scalp so that you extend your neck, keeping your chin level with the floor.) When you stand tall and confident, it is almost impossible to feel un-confident. And if you start to slip into that feeling I can almost guarantee that your posture has slipped.
If any of this article has got you thinking about how a coach could help you, perhaps about:
- More confidence,
- Your sense of purpose
- Working with your energy
- Discovering what your inner song is
You can use the button here to book a call with me and let’s chat
Transformational Women's Coach, Trainer, Speaker & Author
Combining a spiritual outlook, a pragmatic approach, and a sense of humour I want to help you remember who YOU are and reveal YOUR path so you can step on to it empowered, energised, inspired and guided.
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